Book: Dinner with the Smileys by Sarah Smiley

One Military Family, One Year of Heroes, and Lessons for a Lifetime

When Sarah wrote this book, she and her husband Dustin and their three sons lived in Bangor, Maine. Dustin was stationed there as commander of Navy reservists. He was also a Navy pilot. When he is deployed for a year, Sarah decides to invite guests to share dinner with herself and her boys one day a week for the year Dustin will be gone, and this is the story of those guests and those dinners. It is also the story of her sons and how they mature through the year.

I am of two minds about this book. I got it from the library because a woman saw it in the new book section where I was browsing and recommended it. I probably wouldn't picked it up otherwise.

Of course, it is a "feel good" book. What's to not like about it?

Sarah writes of having to stretch some to do this thing..."I don't like to cook, and I hate small talk."

Her kids are not always thrilled and she is honest about the grumpiness, obstinate behavior and anger she sometimes has to deal with. They all survive though and are certainly better for the experiences. They meet and make new friends, and the boys (and Sarah) become the beneficiaries of many acts of generosity as they struggle with loneliness. Also, during this year, Sarah graduates with her Master's degree and teaches part-time. So, yes, she is a busy working mom.

The guests were teachers, coaches, political figures, friends, radio personalities, authors, a US Marshal, the governor. Sometimes the dinners were off-site, like at Fenway Park in Boston, or just a family picnic at her parents' summer place.

So, what didn't I like? It was undoubtedly hard for Sarah to be a single mom for a year, but thousands and thousands of women do this for much of their lives. I'm sure she is a good and well-intentioned lady but perhaps a bit self-absorbed. She got a lot of attention for what she did and tons of support and help. Several of the dinners were not at her home and she didn't have to prepare them. She became the beneficiary of the publicity. It was only in the Acknowledgments that Sarah reveals there was a photographer present "at almost every dinner..." Her name was Andrea Hand. For some reason, it seemed odd that all this time there was a person documenting these dinners without the reader realizing it until the end of the book. It made the whole concept not quite so spontaneous or simple. It made it more of a show.

But, enough already of the negative.....Good for Sarah...